Building your Confidence in 12 Steps
I have mentioned a lot about your exuding and feeling confident when you are giving your speech. For some people that may be easier said than done. This section is geared toward helping you to build your confidence up in 12 easy to follow steps. By the way, these tips work in any speaking engagement.
1. Expect to be nervous and accept it.
Even the most experienced speakers get nervous. Instead of trying to completely get rid of your fears, turn them into energy you can use to give your delivery a boost. Most of the people at the wedding will feel the same way about giving their own speeches.
2. Prepare first.
When you know exactly what you are going to say and why you want to say it certainly changes everything. (If you try to give a speech without being prepared, you should be nervous because your mind is likely to go blank. This is when people start a speech by saying something like Good gentlemen evening
3. Practice in front of others.
Seek out supportive audiences like family and friends to practice in front. The more you do this the easier it gets
4. Breathe in deep and soothing breaths.
In the moments before you begin speaking, take three slow, deep breaths through your nose, filling your belly. As you breathe out, remind yourself to relax.
5. Give yourself affirmations.
Give yourself a pep talk just before you give a speech at a wedding or anywhere else. Tell yourself things like I can do this and If I make a mistake, its okay because it happens all of the time.
6. Focus on your audience and not yourself.
Most stage fright is rooted in self-preoccupation. Dont ask yourself questions about your performance while you are giving it. Stop focusing on yourself. Focus, instead, on your audience and on what you want to say to them. If you are really concerned about how you sound during a wedding speech just ask your audience. Believe it or not, it is very welcome.
7. Simplify what you plan to say.
Most beginning speakers try to say far too much in a single speech. Then they worry about leaving something out or losing their train of thought. What you should be doing is saying only what you must say and not everything that you have ever thought.
8. Visualize success.
Practice relaxation techniques in the days before your presentation (I will be showing these in a later section). Lie down or sit comfortably in a quiet place. Breathe slowly. Close your eyes. You want to try to picture what you will be saying and how people will react. Picture yourself speaking with confidence and thoughtfulness. Make the details as sharp as possible.
9. Connect with your audience.
Make the audience your allies. Talk to individuals before your presentation to get to know a few of them. Look them in the eye as you speak to them, one person at a time. If you can get your audience to identify with you, your job as a speaker becomes much easier and you can relax.
10. Learn to fake it.
Most people won't see how nervous you are. If you loose your train of thought, it helps to be able to wing it. If you learn to fake it, no one will know that you messed up. As long as you hold your chin up, Stick your chest out, and Look confident, even you will not feel inclined to focus on your mistake. After awhile you'll begin to feel it too.
11. Learn from your mistakes.
Accept your mistakes during a wedding speech as part of the learning process. Just because you might make a mistake doesnt mean that you cant learn from it. When you follow the other steps mentioned in this section, you will deal with it in no time.
12. Research your topic
If you are running low on information about the bride and groom, dont be afraid to ask around. People are always willing to help out in a wedding speech.
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